Have you ever said..
I'm not smart enough
I’m not funny enough
I'm not pretty enough
I’m not thin enough
I’m not cool enough
I’m not rich enough
I'm not good enough
What is telling me that I am not enough? I think it’s shame. We’ll take a look at shame a little more in our next word but for now it’s necessary to understand that shame has a voice.
- Shame tells me I don’t belong.
- Shame tells me I need to try harder.
- Shame tells me I can always do better.
- Shame tells me to compare myself to others.
- Shame tells me to hide my imperfections.
- Shame tell me I’m not worthy.
Shame says, “I am bad.” Shame says, “I am a mistake.” Shame want us to focus on ourselves not our behavior. The difference between shame and guilt is simple. Guilt says, “I made a bad choice.” Guilt says, “I made a mistake.” Guilt allows us focus on our behavior and does not define who we are.
3 Things We Do That Keep Us From Being Enough
1. We try to prove our worth.
2. We try to protect our image.
3. We try and please others
We don’t need to DO better. We need to BELIEVE better, THINK better!
For as he thinks within himself, so he is. Proverbs 23:7a NASBStr
Maybe We Should Let Go
- Let go of who we think we are supposed to be.
- Let go of what others think about us.
- Let go of trying to be perfect.
- Let go of comparing ourselves with others.
Why Should We Let Go? Because we are enough!
The reality is we need to believe in the idea of "content." Paul reminds us, "Not that I am implying that I was in any personal want, for I have learned how to be content (satisfied to the point where I am not disturbed or disquieted) in whatever state I am. Philippians 4:11 AMP
Shame is like a ruler. It’s always trying to measure us and we continue to work in order to measure up by gaining acceptance and approval. The simple fact is shame is making us work way to hard to get what we have already been given. It’s, “He (Jesus) made us acceptable to God. Titus 3:7 CEV
How does shame speak to you as a parent?
How does shame speak to you as a leader?
How will you believe better today?