It will happen at some point. Either one of your child’s friends or, I dare say, your sweet little angel, will have something inappropriate saved or sent on their cell phone. When this day arrives how should we respond as parents? Here are four suggestions I think we should take a look at.

1. Respond Don’t React

When you come across a sext or inappropriate text on your child’s phone, the natural response will be to react. What I mean by react is freak out, yell, point, lecture, accuse and rant. I certainly understand. In some ways, it almost feels justifiable. Believe me, I have been there, yelled that.

When you do find something inappropriate on your child’s cell phone, create some space between you and your child to collect your thoughts. When you do this, you are not saying that what you saw or what you discovered was okay or that

The following is from chapter 9 of Faith and the Modern Family...

What is sexting? Sexting is sending, receiving or forwarding sexually explicit content, usually between mobile phones, and it may be happening more frequently than you think––with severe consequences. The National Campaign to Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy and CosmoGirl.com found that 22 percent of girls ages 13–19, and 18 percent of boys ages 13–19 have sent or posted online nude or semi-nude images of themselves. (7)

When sending a sexually suggestive text without a picture, the number increases to 37 percent of girls and 40 percent of boys, with 48 percent of all teens between the ages of 13–19 saying they have received such a message. (8)

Most of the sexting between teens happens within the context of a boyfriend-girlfriend relationship, with girls sending most of the suggestive images to their boyfriends. The consequences of sexting are compounded when the relationship dissolves and the boyfriend forwards the picture to his friends

In my opinion there are three important digital topics to talk about with your child.

1. Cyberbullying (Today’s post)
2. Sexting (The next post)
3. Posting (The next, next post)

Cyberbullying is the use of any form of electronic media to tease, harass, threaten, embarrass, intimidate or humiliate another person online. The old-school definition of bullying included many of the same words: “tease,” “harass,” “threaten” and “humiliate.”

The old-school definition also included the bully being present when the harassment was taking place. Usually, a bully was larger and stronger than other kids (think David and Goliath), just in case the bully had to back up his or her intimidating tactics. But new-school bullying––cyberbullying––is much different, and it’s getting worse:

Cyber Bullying is becoming more and more prevalent. From kids getting together on Facebook to ‘kick a ginger,’ to bullies posting videos of their attacks, we have a whole new world

What I like best about families is that each member is different. We look different, we act differently and we’re interested in different things. Each member has his or her own rhythm and beat. In a musical sense, rhythm is “The pattern of musical movement through time.”

I’m sure you have heard someone described as “marching to the beat of his [or her] own drum.” Usually that means the person has an internal beat or rhythm that is different from most people. It’s a statement about uniqueness and style.

We have many different instruments in our families. In fact, if you have a bigger family, you have a bigger band! But no matter how many people are in your band the goal is to always keep the rhythm!

Why march to the beat of the music playing across the street in someone else’s family when you have everything you need to create your own family rhythm? What I am talking about

Due to inappropriate use of media by children while on campus, a middle school principal sent the following email to the parents of the school children because he wanted to encourage parents to check their child’s media access:

Dear Parents,
I am sending this out to all of you to make you aware of an issue that is becoming more of a concern in all middle schools. Since our return from winter break we have had multiple issues concerning social networking that I want you to be aware of including: students posting images of other students, writing inappropriate comments, posting videos, bullying, etc. These all have an effect on student safety. I am asking all of our parents for support in this matter by taking a few minutes this weekend to have a conversation with your child about social networking and their use of it.

That’s good advice!

The days of parents just needing to check their children’s email or Facebook page are over; there are new social sites created every day. I loudly echo what a friend wrote